Spoiled Wifey Thanksgiving 2011

Our Menu:
Salted Roast Turkey with Herbs and Shallot-Dijon Gravy
Roasted Brussels Sprouts with Garlic and Pancetta
Green Beans with Chives
Cranberry Sauce
Leek and Wild Mushroom Stuffing
Mashed Potatoes
Rolls
Pumpkin, Pecan, & Cherry Pies from Heidelberg Bakery

In all of our married Thanksgivings, this year was the first that we had both of our parents here to celebrate and to feast. That in itself was special, especially considering that both moms had major health scares earlier this year. My Mother-in-Law decided on the menu and generously provided our dinner. Not only did she brave the grocery store for all the ingredients on Wednesday, she did most of the cooking, too. My parents played with the kids. I got to sleep, my favorite indulgence of late. I wish I slept for pure indulgence but that really wasn’t the case. I was unfortunately recovering from a particularly nasty cold/virus and feeling extremely rundown. Sleeping was a necessity. I think Hubby was in the Man Cave for most of the day but he did spend some time in the kitchen, too to help out his Mom.

To keep the Boy amused and to limit whining, one of the kid activities was a Dinosaur Skeleton Excavation Kit, which I think is designed to kill any dream of becoming a real paleontologist and to vex any mother who attempts to keep a clean house. The activity involves sawing away at a block and brush away debris until bones are revealed. Supposedly, there is an entire dinosaur skeleton that can be assembled. Gamie, Hubby and I all had our turn with the young wannabe paleontologist, made a huge mess in the process, and at the time of this posting have only discovered three bones, which are already misplaced. This activity did keep him out of the kitchen and out of our hair for awhile, so I begrudgingly must deem it a success, despite creating more work for myself with cleanup.

During their visit, Grandpa got to play Santa, bringing joy and gifts to our family by funding Grandma’s shopping habit. My mother is an emotional, recreational shopper and is addicted to the high of a good sale, regardless if she/we need it. (I have been trying to reverse my own aimless, shopping-for-entertainment trend for years.) Thankfully, along with my Dad’s intervention, my pleading over the years that I really don’t need any more stuff in my house and that I will only dispose of her gifts , not to mention we don’t have the same style in just about anything, I have finally gotten my message through to curb her shopping generosity towards me.

However, Grandma shopping for her grandkids is a different story. She wanted to direct her energy toward fulfilling my shopping list for the kids, which I find perfectly acceptable. Is it not their job to spoil the grandkids? And isn’t one of my job duties to counteract the spoilage? The kids were SPOILED all week with toys, and more importantly time and attention. Grandma and Grandpa attended the school book fair with the Boy before the holiday break and showed only enthusiasm as he brought a tower of books to the checkout line. Meanwhile, I’m in the background, breaking into a sweat from calculating how much that tower of books is going to set him back. Grandma outfitted Little Girl with socks, socks, and more socks and a new pair of shoes. She gave me only a mild titter when she saw the price tag - $29 for shoes (the most darling pair of Robeez!) but then couldn’t resist to also give me a lecture on how I have expensive tastes. I sighed internally and just smiled. I said nothing but thank you.

I enjoyed spending Thanksgiving with my parents and Mother-in-Law for their company but because they spoiled me, too. I always had a clean kitchen when I woke up in the morning. Someone took the dogs out in the morning. Someone rushed to the nursery at the slightest whimper. Someone read, read, and read some more to Little Boy. Someone let this Mommy sleep, sleep, and sleep some more. My Dad commented that I took a long time getting ready in the mornings—I did disappear for at least 45 glorious minutes – a long shower followed by applying lotion to my body, blow-drying AND styling my hair, and *gasp* applying makeup. I looked and felt terrific. I am rested and almost recovered from the cold, so much so I may just be ready to face Christmas, all its merriment, and my duties of creating magic.

My Mother is Waging a War Against Dog Hair and is Currently Holding Steady

I have admitted defeat when it comes to dog hair in my home. My mother has not.

My parents arrived a few days ago and my mother, upon realizing her precious granddaughter was crawling and doubling as a sweeper, immediately issued a search and destroy order on all things on the floor, mainly the @$#%@$% dog hair. Although there is no need to search. The hair is here, there, and everywhere!

It’s not that I don’t try to engage the combatant dog hair. I do sweep, just not daily. I have recently determined that daily sweeping is necessary, but I have made peace with the fact that I will not actually sweep as required. Furthermore, I have accepted that I have dogs who shed, who I alternately love and hate, and who are part of our family dynamic and therefore cannot be “accidentally locked out”, “lost” on a walk, or advertised as “great with children”.

We deal with dog hair. We don’t wear black. We shake out everything and/or use a hair remover roller before stepping out of the house. I am trying to get into a routine of combing the dogs outside on a semi-regular basis. I have bought stock in Swifter.

Now back to my Mother. As I type this, I spy her walking around my living room, completely engrossed in her mission, once again sweeping up hair for the third time today. I do appreciate her efforts. I really do. I just don’t make the time nor have the desire to constantly sweep what I consider a losing battle. I want clean but not at the expense of my time to do other things. So I engage in battle every other day, or when I can’t stand the sight of it, or I know I have company coming over.

When will I develop the zen of cleaning? It seems a lot of older women have this calm about them when it comes to cleaning. My grandmothers, my mother, and my mother-in-law tap into their inner resolve and this unbelievable energy reserve to clean, especially when they are at my house (And seriously my house is not a pigsty. I do clean, but I won’t ever pass a white glove inspection. I follow the philosophy of “Good Enough” and “Out of Sight, Out of Mind” ). Maybe it’s an unspoken but understood job duty of motherhood. Mothers, once they are on visiting status, help out their grown children by cleaning. Hmmm….I don’t know, but I’ll take it. My workload seems lighter and life on the Home-front seems so much easier when my mother or mother-in-law visits.

However, on the flipside, my mother’s quest for cleanliness is sometimes very dangerous. She now has had two skirmishes that could have been catastrophic for the family. The latest comes on Day 1 of her visit. The whole house slumbered while she stayed up to attack the kitchen. She cleaned the stovetop and then thinking she had won went to bed. Somehow the pilot light on the gas stove went out. I woke up in the middle of the night to tend to Baby Girl and was immediately assaulted with the smell of gas. Hubby re-lit the pilot light. Crisis averted. I hate to think what would have happened if we had an undetected gas leak all night.

My Mom deserves a medal and accolades for her determination and focused concentration against the enemy. Today the battle against dog hair has been won. But tomorrow, who will admit defeat and who will stand victorious? Hair or hair-free?

Sometimes My (In)Ability to Leave My Own House Amazes Even Me!

We just returned yesterday from a “weekend getaway” to New York for a family gathering. The family, aka The Filipino Nation, was gathering to mark the one-year anniversary of the passing of my grandmother. This was the first introduction of Baby Girl to the family, currently the newest member of the clan (although soon to be edged out by another great grandbaby due in March). Little Boy was extremely excited to play with his cousins. And Hubby was actually gracing us with his presence (It’s usually me & the kids at family gatherings since we are almost always travelling great distances and I have all the time in the world.).

I’m currently avoiding the unpacking.

Parents of young children know that going anywhere with children in tow usually requires planning and strategy. It really sucks if you are not a good planner or strategist. I’m not saying whether I’m good or bad, as my skills just depends on my mood, energy level, and time required. While I was excited about this trip, I was not excited about packing for it. Inevitably, because we were driving, I packed the entire house!

My packing list:
• Clothes for me & the children for 2 days (Hubby is on his own for packing.)
• Toiletries (And I STILL forgot to pack the Boy’s toothbrush. Yes, I know I can buy a new one, but it’s the time & money involved. It’s always the little expenses that will get you!)
• Diaper bag & Restocking Supplies
• Baby Food & all related items: spoons, bibs, sippy cups
• Items to Keep Baby Warm, Happy & Entertained: toys, teether, blankets
• Pack N Play
• Stroller
• Snacks & Juice for the car
• Toys, Books, Entertainment (iPad) for the Boy
• Reading Material for me on the off chance I actually get ANY time to myself to read. (Woo Hoo! I did get about 15 minutes to myself to read a few pages of the latest Oprah magazine.)

I also had to set up my GPS, make sure I had all contact information, and get my dogs situated. The dogs are almost just as much work as the kids. I used a pet-sitting service and couldn’t be more pleased. But still had to gather some items for the petsitter.

Add the laundry pile before the packing, and packing literally took me an entire day. Gone are the days of spontaneity. I don’t get too bent out of shape if I don’t have everything I need. I am a Mom; therefore, I can make do. “Mommy-Make-Do” is a great skill to have!

In the end, all the packing and preparation was in fact worth it, as our trip was “fun”. We survived with minimal fighting or tears (Me, that is!) My son was so happy. My daughter was not too fussy and was fascinated with the many new faces of family as she was passed around. My parents were thrilled to see their grandkids and to show them off to the rest of the family.

It will take me at least half a day to unpack from the latest adventure!
But I'm happy to be back home. Memories have been made. Cleaning needs to be done. I'm right on track for the mommy track. Ha!