Parenting Reflections at Weekly Coffee or Alternate Title: How to Respond to “Mommy, if I press on my scrotum, it gives me super fast power.”

Ah…leisurely sipping coffee in the company of my girlfriend(s)…it’s one of my greatest pleasures. Discuss. Sip. Chat. Sip. Vent. Sip. Contemplate. Sip. Encourage. Sip. Breathe.

Today my friend A and I ventured to Busboys & Poets in Shirlington Village for coffee and breakfast. We both give a thumbs up to the location, menu, vibe of the place and will definitely return. Our purpose today was to catch up after over a month of no coffee dates. After a very long wait, A and her husband have adopted a beautiful baby girl and, among the craziness of the holidays, is adjusting to parenthood. We have neither seen or communicated much except for a few texts and Facebook posts. I eagerly listened to her experiences with instant motherhood, nap schedules, and the joys of having the cutest baby girl who sleeps through the night. She is happy. And I am happy for her.

I tend to think that I don’t do very much in a week, especially in comparison (the dreaded comparison) to working moms. Always the same rote routine: groceries, cleaning, laundry, cooking, library runs, playing, errands (and coffee dates!). Granted the past two weeks have been different since we have celebrated Christmas (and my, oh my, the work involved in creating the magic! I wholeheartedly agree with Suburban Turmoil’s Dec 27, 2010 post “Let the Holidays Begin”. ). There is no school, and thankfully Hubby is home on vacation.

However, talking with A this morning made me realize just how many big topics I have addressed for my very curious child in the past 2 weeks. Wow! When does this get any easier?! It doesn’t. I know. But do I always have to feel so unprepared and ambushed?! In no particular order, my child and I have discussed the following topics in the past 2 weeks and let me just say, most came out of left field, of which I was not quite prepared:

Gay Marriage: “Mommy, Isn’t it funny if a boy and a boy get married?”

Death: “Mommy, I am sad that Nanay is turning into bones like the dinosaurs.”

Life Everlasting: “Mommy, I want you to become a vampire so you can live forever. And then I want you to make me a vampire, too so we can live forever together.”

Anatomy: “Mommy, How will the baby get out of your Belly?”

Mario Brothers Game: “Mommy, if I press on my scrotum, it gives me super fast power.”

Hubby and I must have been prepared for Christmas. Because we were not surprised by any questions about Santa and his elves, sleigh delivery time schedules, making of toys and keeping of lists nor on the religious side either, the birth of Jesus in a manger. Kiddo accepted it all without too much questioning….this year, anyway.

My coffee date with A was very refreshing for me because I got to reflect and delight in parenting and all its endless questions. A knows her time is coming. In only a few years she, too, will be answering the “tough” questions. After such heavy duty reflection, our coffee date

ended with a little bit of Cake Love. And that’s what the world needs – more love of any kind!

Next week: Coffee date with A & working mom K.

Estrogen & Caffeine Pow Wow

I’m avoiding the soul searching. [Read previous post] Instead the past week I have been indulging in one of my favorite social activities: coffee with the ladies.

Now I don’t have a daily coffee break with the gals, although I think it would be warranted if I did. As a stay-at-home mama, social interaction requires effort. (Although thank god for Facebook! I feel less isolated and definitely more connected with the world with just a quick skim of status updates.) I still need face-to-face conversation with my “peers” outside the home. I compare it to an extended office coffee break, water cooler break or work lunch that my hubby enjoys on a regular basis with his workmates.

I’m going to say the word my hubby hates and thinks is terribly overused. I feel EMPOWERED with my coffee dates. I think it has to do with the concentration of estrogen that gives the caffeine we are drinking an extra kick. A chat with the ladies and suddenly I feel like I can do most anything. Tackle the never-ending to do list. Confront. Comfort. Support. Whine. Motivate.

The collective sharing of our lives gives each of us more depth and perspective. Here is a sample of our coffee chat from last week:

• husband gripes & kudos (Kudos to the hubby who single-handedly took care of his 18-month twins for 3 days while wifey was on a mini-vacation with other mamas. Yes, wifeys do this all the time without accolades but since it’s a departure from the norm for their household, we do give him props.

• our impending relocations and its associated to-do list (house-hunting, commuting considerations, school/day care, jobs/career options)

• our preschool boys’ love of the word poop

• after patiently waiting for 5 years, the impending adoption of a beautiful little girl from China and how life will change (i.e. they will finally buy a microwave! What parents can survive without a microwave?!)

• pilfering through a Mary Kay makeup stash of a consultant getting out of the business

• allergy symptoms and the best OTC remedies (thanks to our resident SAHM nurse practitioner)

Our next estrogen pow wow is tomorrow. I can hardly wait. I’m already thinking about my topic of discussion: the Tiger Woods interview at the Masters. Could it be any more of a good ole boys network? Or maybe I can get some tips how to completely remove cranberry juice stain from my carpet (since my steamvac is broken). Hmmmm….who knows what the discussion will be.

But let me suggest that tomorrow you too experience an uplifting energy surge. Drink coffee with your gal pals!